Gawd, that sounds horrible!!
Be nice to me, it's my frackin' birthday. I don't want to be fire-hosed. OR lilac rubbed for that matter.
If you're going to pelt me with anything...make it dark chocolate covered roasted espresso beans rolled in cinnamon sugar.
That sounds good for you, sure...but where'd the fun be for all of us?
Happy Birthday, JetGirl!