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Be sure to read this post! Beware of scammers. https://www.indianagunowners.com/threads/classifieds-new-online-payment-guidelines-rules-paypal-venmo-zelle-etc.511734/
INGO: Joke of the day page
- Thread starter FordMan08
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- ban mbills!
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Horsetrader
Plinker
Woman was begging her husband to let her get a breast enlargement for 5k. He finally told her to save her money and just rub toilet paper between her breast. She replied: why would I do that? He replied: worked on your ass.
Followed very quickly by the e.r. trying to stabilize him for reconstructive surgery.
The two old whores from England were sitting at the bar, just snockered, when the man with the mustache walks in scratching his ass.
The whore looks at man with the mustache and says, "What's wrong with you today?" The man with the mustache looks at the whore and said, "Well, I had to call the cops on two women that were fighting over me."
One of the old whores said, "Why'd you do that?"
The man with the mustache said, "Cause the ugly one was winning!
The whore looks at man with the mustache and says, "What's wrong with you today?" The man with the mustache looks at the whore and said, "Well, I had to call the cops on two women that were fighting over me."
One of the old whores said, "Why'd you do that?"
The man with the mustache said, "Cause the ugly one was winning!
The two old whores from England were sitting at the bar just snockered, when the man with the mustache walks in scratching his ass. The whore looks at man with the mustache and says, "What's wrong with you today?" The man with the mustache looks at the whores and said, "Well, we just found out that my grandfather is addicted to Viagra, no one is taking it harder than my grandmother."
Horsetrader
Plinker
Horsetrader
Plinker
This fits this election to a t. Four years of hell coming , condom is suppose to protect you
Horsetrader
Plinker
Do you know the difference between a prostitute and a lawyer? A prostitute will stop screwing you if you die.
Being a transplanted Virginian, I thought I'd share an old saying and accompanying story with my fellow Hoosiers.
There is a saying in Va. That goes all the way back to Jamestown, circa 1625.... "It's like mule P*ssy, it's there for ya" which means, if you need to use/borrow something, go ahead and take it.
The story goes to the time when Jamestown was having Indian troubles, they had small outpost scattered about the main settlement, usually only a half to full dozen soldiers..well this private told the sergeant he needed some female companionship...ole sarge took the private into the horse stalls..all the way in the back was an old mule, Sarge said " here ya go".....private responded by saying NO WAY!...after a few weeks the mules looking better and better.... finally the private couldnt take it anymore and has his way with the mule.
He goes to the Sarge and says that the mule was pretty darn good..Sarge slaps the private and says "no, you idiot, your supposed to ride the mule back to Jamestown and find a women!,"
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.
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Naw, not really, just joking with ya all.
There is a saying in Va. That goes all the way back to Jamestown, circa 1625.... "It's like mule P*ssy, it's there for ya" which means, if you need to use/borrow something, go ahead and take it.
The story goes to the time when Jamestown was having Indian troubles, they had small outpost scattered about the main settlement, usually only a half to full dozen soldiers..well this private told the sergeant he needed some female companionship...ole sarge took the private into the horse stalls..all the way in the back was an old mule, Sarge said " here ya go".....private responded by saying NO WAY!...after a few weeks the mules looking better and better.... finally the private couldnt take it anymore and has his way with the mule.
He goes to the Sarge and says that the mule was pretty darn good..Sarge slaps the private and says "no, you idiot, your supposed to ride the mule back to Jamestown and find a women!,"
.
.
.
Naw, not really, just joking with ya all.
A man has to have his priorities straight and Mr. Dobson does.
Master tech
Plinker
What's the difference between in-laws and outlaws?
Outlaws are WANTED!
Outlaws are WANTED!
A girl asks her boyfriend to come over Friday night and have dinner with her parents. Since this is such a big event, the girl announces to her boyfriend that after dinner, she would like to go out and make love for the first time.
Well, the boy is ecstatic, but he has never had sex before, so he takes a trip to the pharmacist to get some condoms. The pharmacist helps the boy for about an hour. He tells the boy everything there is to know about condoms and sex.
At the register, the pharmacist asks the boy how many condoms he'd like to buy, a 3-pack, 10-pack, or family pack. The boy insists on the family pack because he thinks he will be rather busy, it being his first time and all.
That night, the boy shows up at the girl's parent's house and meets his girlfriend at the door. "Oh, I'm so excited for you to meet my parents, come on in!" The boy goes inside and is taken to the dinner table where the girl's parents are seated. The boy quickly offers to say grace and bows his head. A minute passes, and the boy is still deep in prayer, with his head down. 10 minutes pass, and still no movement from the boy. Finally, after 20 minutes with his head down, the girlfriend leans over and whispers to the boyfriend, "I had no idea you were this religious."
The boy turns, and whispers back, "I had no idea your father was a pharmacist."
Well, the boy is ecstatic, but he has never had sex before, so he takes a trip to the pharmacist to get some condoms. The pharmacist helps the boy for about an hour. He tells the boy everything there is to know about condoms and sex.
At the register, the pharmacist asks the boy how many condoms he'd like to buy, a 3-pack, 10-pack, or family pack. The boy insists on the family pack because he thinks he will be rather busy, it being his first time and all.
That night, the boy shows up at the girl's parent's house and meets his girlfriend at the door. "Oh, I'm so excited for you to meet my parents, come on in!" The boy goes inside and is taken to the dinner table where the girl's parents are seated. The boy quickly offers to say grace and bows his head. A minute passes, and the boy is still deep in prayer, with his head down. 10 minutes pass, and still no movement from the boy. Finally, after 20 minutes with his head down, the girlfriend leans over and whispers to the boyfriend, "I had no idea you were this religious."
The boy turns, and whispers back, "I had no idea your father was a pharmacist."
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