Woman was begging her husband to let her get a breast enlargement for 5k. He finally told her to save her money and just rub toilet paper between her breast. She replied: why would I do that? He replied: worked on your ass.
Obama wants to alter the flag !!
The government today announced that it is changing the national flag to a Condom because it more accurately reflects the governments political stance.
A Condom allows for inflation, halts production, destroys the next generation, protects a bunch of pricks, and gives you a sense of security while you are actually being screwed.
Christmas movies are the best.