Man Rules

The #1 community for Gun Owners in Indiana

Member Benefits:

  • Fewer Ads!
  • Discuss all aspects of firearm ownership
  • Discuss anti-gun legislation
  • Buy, sell, and trade in the classified section
  • Chat with Local gun shops, ranges, trainers & other businesses
  • Discover free outdoor shooting areas
  • View up to date on firearm-related events
  • Share photos & video with other members
  • ...and so much more!
  • spasmo

    ಠ_ಠ
    Site Supporter
    Rating - 100%
    5   0   0
    Apr 27, 2008
    6,659
    38
    eyje-com-the-difference-between-men.jpg
     

    spasmo

    ಠ_ಠ
    Site Supporter
    Rating - 100%
    5   0   0
    Apr 27, 2008
    6,659
    38
    Here's a good read.. :)

    The difference between Men and Women…the battle of the sexes continues! | BlueAnything

    The Men Vs Women debate has been ongoing since the stone ages (or so it seems) & I believe that as long as they’re on this earth together battle of the sexes will reign! So just how different are men from women? Just take a look below and I’ll let you be the be the judge of the fairer sex…
    Maturity:
    Women: They mature much faster than men. Most 17-year old females can function as adults.

    Men: Most 17-year old males are still joking about farts (who am I kidding I still do that!) and giving each other wedgies after gym class.
    Handwriting:
    Women: Women use scented, colored stationery and they dot the “i” with circles or hearts. They use ridiculously large loops in their y’s and g’s. It’s a pain to read a note from a woman. Even when she’s dumping you, she will put a smiley face at the end of the note. (I think she does this to let you know she is happy about the dumping. Ouch!)
    Men: To their credit, men do not decorate their penmanship. In fact, consider yourself lucky if you can read any of it!
    Bathrooms:
    Men: A man has six items in his bathroom — a toothbrush, shaving cream, razor, soap, and a towel from the Holiday Inn.
    Women: The average number of items in the typical woman’s bathroom is 285. A man cannot identify most of these items.
    Shoes:
    Women: When preparing for work, a woman will put on a wool suit, then slip on Reebok sneakers. She will carry her dress shoes in a plastic bag from Macy’s. When a woman gets to work, she will put on her dress shoes. Five minutes later, she will kick them off because her feet are under the desk.
    Men: A man will wear the same pair of shoes all day. Let’s not talk about how many days he’ll wear the same socks. (Don’t even get me started on the other under-garments…)
    Groceries:
    Women: A woman makes a list of things she needs, then goes out to the store and buys those things….along with 50 things she didn’t need, want, or even think of. However since they were on sale… .she had to have them.
    Men: A man waits till the only items left in his fridge are half a lime and a beer. Then he goes grocery shopping. He buys everything that looks good an by the time he reaches the checkout counter, his cart is packed tighter than 20 clowns in Volkswagen Beetle… of course, this will not stop him from going to the express lane.
    Laundry:
    Women: Women do laundry every couple of days. If they don’t smell like detergent, fabric soften and all things girly they get thrown back in the wash.
    Men: A man will wear every article of clothing he owns, including his surgical pants that he wore home from the hospital when he had surgery on his esophagus for trying to prove he could stuff 27 large marsh-mellows in his mouth at once, before he will do his laundry. When he is finally out of clothes, he will wear a dirty sweatshirt inside out, rent a U-Haul and finally take his mountain of clothes to the Laundromat. While Men always expect to meet beautiful women at the Laundromat he soon realizes that is just one of those things that happen only in movies, cos the only people he meets at the Laundromat are other men trying to figure out how to turn on the machines.
    Mirrors:
    Men: Men don’t really care what they look like. If their hair feels messy, they wear hats. (even old raggedy hats that smell like something died wearing it and he was the lucky bastard who found it.)
    Women: They are ridiculous; they will check out their reflections in any shiny surface: mirrors, spoons, store windows, the backs of dvd’s or cd’s or even bald guys heads.
    Jewelry:
    Women: Women look nice when they wear jewelry.
    Men: A man can get away with wearing one ring and that’s it. Any more than that and he will look like a lounge singer named Vic.
    .
    .
    The Phone:
    Men: Men say three words on the phone – “hey”, “cool”, and “later.”

    Women: A woman can visit her girlfriend for two weeks and upon returning home, she will call the same friend and they will talk for three hours.
    Restrooms:
    Women: Women use restrooms as social lounges. Women also go to the restroom in packs, at least two women at a time excuse themselves to use the restroom. Women who’ve never met will leave a restroom giggling together like old friends.
    Men: Men use restrooms for purely biological reasons. Men in a restrooms will never speak a word to each other. And never in the history of the world has a man excused himself from a restaurant table by saying, “Hey, Tom, I was just about to go to the restroom. Do you want to join me?”
    .
    Cats:
    Women: Women love cats.
    Men: Men say they love cats, but when women aren’t looking, men kick cats (a lot!).
     

    rhino

    Grandmaster
    Rating - 100%
    24   0   0
    Mar 18, 2008
    30,906
    113
    Indiana
    I only know two rules, and I learned them from my mother and two older sisters:

    1. I am wrong.
    2. It is/was my fault.

    Those two cover every conceivable situation. Plus, I'm ready to be married because I've already been broken to the point where I've lost the will to live. It's like buying a low mileage used husband with a full factory warranty.
     

    Scutter01

    Grandmaster
    Rating - 100%
    2   0   0
    Mar 21, 2008
    23,750
    48
    There are only two things you need to know:

    1) All men are idiots.
    2) All women are insane.

    Keep those in mind and you'll be able to deal with anything.
     

    RogerB

    Master
    Rating - 0%
    0   0   0
    Feb 5, 2008
    3,133
    36
    New Palestine
    kinda surprised no one has thrown this into the mix yet...

    [ame="http://tr.youtube.com/watch?v=UuAiA4_Tujs"]YouTube - Bob and Tom - the man song[/ame]
     

    redneckmedic

    Grandmaster
    Rating - 100%
    16   0   0
    Jan 20, 2009
    8,429
    48
    Greenfield
    I only know two rules, and I learned them from my mother and two older sisters:

    1. I am wrong.
    2. It is/was my fault.

    Oh little fella you have so much to learn, you must have missed that super secret ninja video that cost 4 american men marine lives to steal from the national womens association monthly meeting!

    These are just set-up questions to be followed up by...

    What are you sorry for? or What did you do wrong?

    And if you don't have the perfect answer, you are in deeper trouble for insulting her premeditated intelligance!!!

    Flowers and Chocolate is so much easier (distraction!)

    Which brings up another point....why do women get flowers and chocolate when we are wrong, but we don't get porn when they are wrong!?!

    Oh wait, no women has even admitted to being wrong!!!:D
     

    ATM

    will argue for sammiches.
    Site Supporter
    Rating - 100%
    30   0   0
    Jul 29, 2008
    21,019
    83
    Crawfordsville
    Two old favorites:

    I thought I was wrong once... but I was mistaken.

    My wife married Mr. Right. My first name is Always.

    I mentally repeat them to myself when I am wrong and apologizing.:cool:
     

    GhostofWinter

    Master
    Rating - 100%
    17   0   0
    Jan 12, 2009
    3,191
    83
    Lake Station-NW Indiana
    Is it me or has anyone else noticed that it seems to be the WOMEN that are posting all the photos from the net, the LONG replies and such on here? Seems to me that MAYBE they are trying to tell us they have too much FREE time on their hands and need more to do.....*dons flameproof suit...*
     

    spasmo

    ಠ_ಠ
    Site Supporter
    Rating - 100%
    5   0   0
    Apr 27, 2008
    6,659
    38
    FREE TIME?? What in the world is free time? I'm married, have a kid, work, am a mod... free time doesn't exist... can someone describe how it feels to have free time?? And explain how one gets free time... :D
     

    Scutter01

    Grandmaster
    Rating - 100%
    2   0   0
    Mar 21, 2008
    23,750
    48
    Is it me or has anyone else noticed that it seems to be the WOMEN that are posting all the photos from the net, the LONG replies and such on here? Seems to me that MAYBE they are trying to tell us they have too much FREE time on their hands and need more to do.....*dons flameproof suit...*

    I told Spasmo to get me another beer, but the everything went dark and I woke up in a pool of blood. I must have fallen asleep and hit my head or something. :dunno:
     

    Scutter01

    Grandmaster
    Rating - 100%
    2   0   0
    Mar 21, 2008
    23,750
    48
    FREE TIME?? What in the world is free time? I'm married, have a kid, work, am a mod... free time doesn't exist... can someone describe how it feels to have free time?? And explain how one gets free time... :D

    **** Spoiler Alert ****

    I had 8 episodes on the TiVo and watched 6 of them this weekend because 2 of them were freaking recap shows. I hate those recap shows! But anyway... OH MY GOSH... I am glad that next year will be the series finale.

    :whistle:
     

    spasmo

    ಠ_ಠ
    Site Supporter
    Rating - 100%
    5   0   0
    Apr 27, 2008
    6,659
    38
    That was not free time... That was my daughter is at a friends house and it's quiet. I had already planted 6 trees this week so I was done working.. AHEM!!
     
    Top Bottom