wife is afraid of guns

[Bhriindan82]

Seems like good advice, Tinman. Rep'd.

 

[Pami]

Tinman's advice is spot on.

A snippet following a personal anecdote from a previous response of mine:

The moral of the story: she has to wake up to it herself. Lars didn't push. He talked when he knew he could, and when I told him I was done talking, he stopped. When I made the decision to accept guns in the house, he talked more, but stopped when I was done. He let me lead our discussions every time.

The important part is that you don't push, and she has to accept guns in her own time. Acceptance could range from you owning one and having it in the house but she doesn't ever want to know about it, to going out to the range with you every weekend and shooting better than you with that Glock 19 she picked out herself and then had coated pink.

 

[Fordmadman]

I've been with my gf for about a year now and when we got together she found out I collect guns at first she was scared of them but the thing about it is she never shot one well one weekend I took my 357 my 38 and my ruger 10/22 to the range and showed her how to load and shoot them properly and now shes hooked on it she wants one of her own and shes not afraid to shoot anything my cousin let her shoot his chinese sks and she loved it.

 

[obijohn]

tinman is wise. i believe his post reads like a "how to". probably should be a sticky.

the NRA FIRST steps class and any of the basic classes would be good for both of you. one leads into the other. the classes are structured to ease you into gun ownership. very safety heavy. when ACT does the class, we don't even have the folks bring their own pistols, we supply .22's and ammo. very controlled, very one-step-at-a time.

above all, as i believe has been mentioned, i suggest you be patient and objective. and don't be discouraged if you are not heading to the gun store after your first attempt.

 

[Pami]

tinman is wise. i believe his post reads like a "how to". probably should be a sticky.

Excellent suggestion, and it has now been stickified!
https://www.indianagunowners.com/forums/women_and_firearms/12060-my_wife_is_afraid_of_guns.html

I closed the stickied thread to keep the purity of Tinman's response, but feel free to continue the discussion in this thread.

 

[Tinman]

Wow, the first sticky, I'm honored.

Thanks for all the props. Just posting what's worked in the past for some folks I've helped out. Glad you'll got some use out of it. Let me know how it works for you, always interested in feedback.

Tinman....

 

[rcuhljr]

Great read, I'm in a relatively new relationship and my owning of firearms has only come up tangentially so far, and I haven't gotten a read on how she feels about it, if I don't get lucky I may be back here to re-read this thread :P

 

[JBrockman]

If you have kids get them involved in your counties 4H shooting sports program and have the wife attend the meetings and shoots with them! We have had several mothers that once they become comfortable with son/daughter handling firearms they become interested and we let them join in and shoot also!

 

[Jack Ryan]

How do I get my wife not to be afraid of guns anymore. If I get a gun she thinks I will get hurt.

Every thing has it's good side and bad side. Just look on the bright side. Don't show them to her and she will never know how many you've got or what you spend of them.

 

[smokingman]

I ran into the same problem with my fiance. I talked her into going to shoot with me one day. I took a 10/22,a walther p22,and a nagant with us to the range. I showed her how to load,be safe,and gave her the 10/22(took the scope off...everyone should learn with open sights lol). She shot it a few times and did not seem to be having much fun. I loaded up the nagant next to her and shot 5 rounds....she was amazed...and wanted to shoot the "cannon". I made sure she pulled it in tight and prepped her a little on what to expect. She shot 10 rounds with no pad(she thought the past pad was silly) and loved it.One sore shoulder later she was hooked(and wanted a past pad lol).We shot 30 or so more rounds from the nagant and 100 or so out of the 10/22 and left the range.The next weekend was a 1500 gun and knife show,I had always gone solo but she wanted to go now...long story but that was 3 years ago.SHE now owns a custom nagant carbine(scoped),30-30,10/22,ak,beretta 92fs,maddi ak,tauraus pt140(she has a carry permit now and always carries) and a few other rifles.I have to stop her from buying guns and ammo sometimes lol.I know i am blessed...but the moral is get them to shoot and they will understand. She thinks shooting is close to the most relaxing thing in the world now.
Things to teach on that first trip.
1.Safe weapon handling(muzzle down range,loading,ect..)
2.sight picture.I took a pen and paper...if they have never been shooting they have no idea what they are looking for.
3.Do not let them "rush" shoots. Teach her breath control,I taught my fiance to shoot after an exhale(pause after exhaling then shoot).
4. Difference between jerking the trigger and pulling it(snap caps are a good tool for this). Told my fiance it should sup prize her when it breaks
5.Relax...yes you have to tell them lol!
6. Fun...let them load,fire,look at the target.
7. last and very important, let HER be in control of the situation as much as possible.Your job is to make sure she is safe,learning.and having fun.She will not learn it all in one day and dont try teach every thing in one day.
8.After she shoots get her to a gun shop or show.My fiance has the 30-30 because it is " pretty" lol.
9. Get Her to go to the range with HER new gun...=she is hooked for life.
thats about it i guess ...on a good day my fiance can out shoot me.

ps. If you need a female shooter my fiance would be glad to help..we are both in our mid 30s...and atterbury is only 20 min away for us.

 

[GunSlinger77]

While I can not relate to people who were not raised shooting guns, I can relate to people who are being introduced to something new or something that they have had a negative view towards in the past. In my personal experience, I hate to be talked down to or looked down on because I don't know how to do something. I would suggest starting by getting her around women who are really into guns and shooting and would put her at ease.

 

[IndyGunSafety]

Have her take an NRA Basic Pistol Course. She can learn all about handguns and then will be armed with knowledge and can make a better decision. She still may hate guns. But I have never had anyone leave one of my classes hating guns!

 

[Joe Williams]

Try to see if you can get her hooked up with some of the female shooters on this board to go target shooting, maybe. A nice, safe, no testosterone environment where she can feel safe asking any questions she has without fear of ridicule.

 

[Coach]

We (ACT) have a BP 100 Course on April the 3rd. A four hour course and if you bring the ammo we can loan her a gun to use. We have had some very successful session with women and people new to guns with this course. You are free to use your firearms as well and nothing is done from the holster. There is a classroom portion and a live fire session. My ten year old daughter has taken the course, and I can have her retake with this group. I would think a ten year old girl safely handling and operating a gun might work well to convince someone with doubts. Send me an email if interested and we can work out the details.

 

[Pami]

Holy thread revival, Bat Man! The original post was in 2008!

 

[Garb]

My mom used to be afraid of guns, and now she is thinking about getting one because both of her sisters started shooting. She still thinks i'm going to shoot myself in the foot, but I think that's just her mom instinct kicking in haha. Just get one and let her shoot it a few times. Maybe that will remedy it.

 

[LEaSH]

Seems to be a frequently revisited subject.

A rose by any other name, is still a rose.

 

[Andre46996]

Screw it get rid of the wife and get more guns!!!!

WIN!!!

 

[drgnrobo]

Stop putting masks on your guns and going BOOGA BOOGA BOOGA with them But seriously, talk with her about how you feel about owning & carrying a firearm (without a fight ensuing) & if necessary ,take a class & have her go with you to educate her .Find stats on crime and just be as thorough as possible getting your point across. After a few close calls me & my wife have had ,She admitted to me that she would have been more scared if it wasnt the fact that I carry everywhere( legally of course) The mere fact that you want to feel the need to protect yourselves should carry alot of weight in your argument ( for lack of a better term)

 

[JJGatesE30]

Bringing this thread back to life...

Looking back, I didnt take the best approach to getting my wife into guns. The first gun I ever bought was an AK-47 (WASR-10) She thought it was cool but had never fired ANY kind of gun before. Well, the first time I got her to go with me to shoot it at a range it took me something like half an hour just to get her to pull the trigger.

That was back in 2004, AK's are now her favorite rifle and she is a better shot than me.