Spousal support (or not) of concealed carry

[rjstew317]

I also may or may not have thrown myself into sticky situations when she was around, and she went from "Why do you need that" to "Im glad you carry"
but that was my approach, and I almost got my unarmed A** kicked a couple of times, so I don't recommend it.
And no, I don't do that now that I carry, It was more of a prove a point type thing.

I'm not trying to railroad things here but what exactly are you out doing that puts you into "sticky situations" or that might have gotten your "unarmed *** kicked"? you know the old saying: if you go looking for trouble, your bound to find it.

 

[Bapak2ja]

I'm not trying to railroad things here but what exactly are you out doing that puts you into "sticky situations" or that might have gotten your "unarmed *** kicked"? you know the old saying: if you go looking for trouble, your bound to find it.

rjstew317, sometimes there is wisdom in "Don't ask. Don't tell." Are you sure you want him to answer this question? I really do not want to know what he was doing. Although, you make a good point. If he is inclined to jump into those situations, he probably should not be carrying. "He's gonna git som'n kilt! Sure as God made little green apples!"

 

[red_zr24x4]

my vote was
My Spouse (significant other) does not carry but supports the fact that I do

but it is selective.. sometimes its why are you bringing that and others its did you bring your gun????

 

[rjstew317]

If he is inclined to jump into those situations, he probably should not be carrying.

that's what i was thinking

 

[WebSnyper]

My wife, knows I carry all the time, knows I shoot all the time, sees them out on my desk when I'm doing whatever with them, HAS NO DESIRE IN THE WORLD TO SHOOT!!!

But doesn't say a word when we go out because I think deep down she knows I'm doing it to protect her too if the situation ever arose.

Don't push the issue with your wife, ask to take her out to shoot, and be discrete about carry.

Similar here. My wife has come to accept things.

We had a discussion recently and she kind of questioned my carrying on a particular occasion, indicating, "do you think you are going to need that?" My response was "do you think that the Congresswoman in AZ and the other people in the area thought they were going to run into the situation they did that day?"

I haven't heard to much more about it after that (I could almost see the light bulb over her head for a second after that remark), but as you stated, I keep it discreet.

 

[Vince49]

Oops!

She only gets in a snit if I pick up her G26 instead of my G27 by mistake!

 

[Huzrjim]

My wife was mildly anti-handgun when we met, as she had only experienced long guns in her past when family members would go hunting. She frequently questioned why anyone would need to carry a firearm. I would point out news stories, where either the lack or presence of legally carried firearms made or might have made a difference. I took her out shooting on several occasions and stressed how important gun safety is to me.

Over the course of the past 3-4 years, I've turned her son into a hunter and avid shooter and he is looking at getting a carry permit and handgun as well. My wife has recently expressed an interest in actually shooting a gun when I go to the range and is now more comfortable around guns and particularly with me carrying one. I also jokingly use the phrase that I've seen on someone's signatgure here: "I carry a handgun because a policeman is too heavy"

I recommend just continue to slowly work the issue. Education and patience are probably the best keys to success.

Good luck!

 

[eldirector]

My vote:
My Spouse (significant other) does not currently carry but supports the fact that I do and intends to get their permit eventually

I carry, and my wife ALSO has her license, but does not carry (yet). We wanted her to have the option to carry, or even just "hold" my handgun, while we were out and about. She has a ways to go until SHE is comfortable carrying, but she EXPECTS me to carry every day.

She has carried OC spray for years, and has even used it in defense a couple of times.

 

[EnochRoot43]

I have stated I will not need any more firearms after the .22.

Uh oh....but you don't have a shotgun yet!

 

[Rayne]

I'll put a twist on things here. I'm a middle aged lady and I carry and my husband doesn't. We've both had our LTCH for 30 years. He will have a pistol in the truck sometimes when he's traveling between farms or there is one in the other truck when we go to town but he never carries on his person.

I on the other hand have started to carry again after a long absence due to children in sports and the no gun policy. I decided I wanted a different CC gun, which he didn't object to too much. He's not gunho about the whole carrying prospect, but he's not totally discouraging me either. He sometimes rolls his eyes at me because I have become so interested in guns again, but it's not a disgusted eye roll more of a "oh my gosh my wife has gone nuts" type of eye roll with a smirky smile on his face.

As far as the OP's question, my husband has trouble articulating what he is feeling and that causes communication problems with us sometimes. So if you're anything like him, you need to try very hard to find the right words, even if they are from an article or some other type print to help her understand the need for family protection. Explain to her that you are doing this to protect her too and it's not some type of ego trip and that you hope she will understand your need to do so. After that let her know that you will be discrete about your carrying habits and then do so. When you get dressed put your gun on and CC it to where she doens't even know you have it on.

That's my for what it's worth.

 

[littletommy]

My wife doesn't currently carry, but has had a LTCH before. I've been on her to get a lifetime, and she will before too long. She doesn't need to ask if I'm carrying, she knows I always do.

 

[Que]

My wife and I have been married for 20-years. When we met, I had six years of service under my belt and was about to enter the SF qualification course at Fort Bragg. After much consideration and the fact I had been deployed three times prior to meeting her, I decided if I was serious about her, I would not commit to the 18-series. I write this because I want you do know I was "into" guns before we even met.

Fast-forward some years and I bought a gun when I was sent to Indy for recruiting duty. We get pregnant and I get rid of my gun. Forward some 12 years and I get a gun after hearing about all of the robberies and home invasions occurring in the city. At this point my wife is mad, upset, disturbed, and ticked!

I respect my wife's feelings, but I am responsible for the safety of my home. I ultimately believe, as she does, that God is our ultimate protector; however... Needless to say, we are still not in agreement, but I try to keep my guns out of her sight. I've left them in the open a couple of times and she was pretty cool about it, but I still don't want to push past her newly established comfort/acceptance point.

I hope this works out for you and I have no real advice, other than not letting this issue divide your relationship to the point of separation. It's not worth that to me, although I'm sure many others would disagree.

 

[windellmc]

^^^^this^^^^

That is a two way street. It does not mean just do whatever your wife says.

 

[Bapak2ja]

She only gets in a snit if I pick up her G26 instead of my G27 by mistake!

You got a keeper!

 

[Bapak2ja]

Uh oh....but you don't have a shotgun yet!

Actually, I bought a 12ga 5-shot pump Westernfield (Mossberg) back before we were married. It stills works and I have two boxes of shells in the ammo safe. I really do think I have things covered.

 

[Jtgarner]

ok, I did not read the whole thread, but you asked that I give advice if I voted, and I voted so here is my advice:

First, I voted for "My Spouse (significant other) does not carry but supports the fact that I do" but I fall pretty close to the option above it. My wife has a LTCH, but she has never carried (yet).

When I met my wife I was only into shooting a little bit, I had a 10/22, and Mossberg 500, and that was it. I was more into tournament paintball at the time. Since I got back from Boot Camp I have gotten a Glock 22, an AR15, and two 19111s. Right before my deployment I asked her to get a lifetime LTCH for herself as a birthday present to me. I took her out shooting and started her on a paintball gun, where she could see her impacts, learn the safety rules, and shoot at pretty much whatever she wanted. I then took the paintball gun away and gave her my 10/22 to shoot at some pop cans and plastic bottles. (I set up the cans in a pyramid and filled the bottles with water so she could have a little fun with it) she was VERY nervous at first, but after a few shots she was having a great time. I let her go with that for a little while before trying to push her into pistols. She shot a .40 glock, a 9mm glock, a ruger .22 auto pistol, a ruger .22 revolver, and some .38 revolvers. She loved the .22 pistols, but I had her keep shooting the bigger guns and she got pretty good (she still likes the .22s the best). I then bought her a .357 revolver that I put laser grips on and load up with .38s. That is her nightstand gun (and CC gun if she ever decides to carry). She usually doesn't ask to go shooting, although sometimes she does. I just let her decide when she is ready.
For the record she didn't like me carrying at first because she didn't think I needed it. I have yet to "need" it, but we have been in some shady places where she looked at me and said, "Do you have it?" and I said yes and she was relieved.

I say try to take her shooting and go from there. A lot of the time the dislike of firearms is just a misunderstanding because they have never tried them.

 

[E5RANGER375]

your an adult right? carry one if you wish. put your foot down on this one. i dont own my wife either nor do i tell her what she can or cant do.

i voted. my wife also carry's. she didnt before we were together though

 

[7.62-5.56Plinker]

My old grandpa said to me, "Son, there comes a time in every man's life when he stops busting knuckles and starts busting caps and usually it's when he becomes too old to take an ass whooping." I don't carry a gun to kill people. I carry a gun to keep from being killed. I don't carry a gun to scare people. I carry a gun because sometimes this world can be a scary place. I con't carry a gun because I'm paranoid. I carry a gun because there are real threats in the world. I don't carry a gun because I'm evil. I carry a gun because I have lived long enought to see the evil in the world. I don't carry a gun because I hate the government. I carry a gun because I understand the limitations of the government. I don't carry a gun because I'm angry. I carry a gun so I that I don't have to spend the rest of my life hating myself for failing to be prepared. I don't carry a gun because I want to shoot someone. I carry a gun because I want to die at a ripe old age in my bed and not on a sidewalk somewhere tomorrow afternoon. I don't carry a gun because I'm a cowboy. I carry a gun because when I die and go to Heaven, I want to be a cowboy. I don't carry a gun to make me feel like a man. I carry a gun because men know how to take care of themselves and the ones they love. I don't carry a gun because I feel inadequate. I carry a gun because unarmed and facing three armed thugs, I am inadequate. I don't carry a gun because I love it. I carry a gun because I love life and and the people who make it meaningful to me. "Police Protection" is an oxymoron. Free citizens must protect themselves. Police do not protect you from crime; they usually just investigate the crime after it happens and then call someone in to clean up the mess. Personally, I carry a gun because I'm too young to die and too old to take an ass whooping.

 

[g00n24]

My fiance was at first apprehensive about guns...I took her to the range a few times and got her comfortable with a 9mm. Got her a Taurus pt111, sold that and now she carries a Ruger Sr9c (which I am going to make a holster for so I can also carry it)
She still doesn't carry all the time (which I would prefer her to do) but she carries so that's a plus

 

[dfcrane]

My wife supports the fact that I carry, but she does not carry herself.