Pun Jokes: Just for Fun

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  • Bapak2ja

    Master
    Rating - 100%
    10   0   0
    Dec 17, 2009
    4,580
    48
    Fort Wayne
    I changed my i Pod name to Titanic. It's syncing now.
    How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.
    When chemists die, they barium.
    Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.
    A soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
    I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid . He says he can stop any time.
    I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Than it dawned on me.
    This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met herbivore.
    I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I can't put it down.
    I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.
    They told me I had type A blood , but it was a Type- O.
    A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
    PMS jokes aren't funny, period.
    Why were the Indians here first ? They had reservations.
    Class trip to the Coca-Cola factory. I hope there's no pop quiz.
    Energizer bunny arrested . Charged with battery.
    I didn't like my beard at first . Then it grew on me.
    How do you make holy water? Boil the hell out of it!
    Did you hear about the cross eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn't control her pupils?
    When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.
    What does a clock do when it's hungry? It goes back four seconds.
    I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me!
    Broken pencils are pointless.
    I tried to catch some fog. I mist.
    What do you call a dinosaur with a extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.
    England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.
    I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.
    All the toilets in New York's police stations have been stolen. Police have nothing to go on.
    I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.
    Haunted French pancakes give me the crepes.
    Velcro - what a rip off!
    Cartoonist found dead in home. Details are sketchy.
    Venison for dinner? Oh deer!
    Earthquake in Washington obviously government's fault.
    I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not so sure.
    Be kind to your dentist. He has fillings, too.
     

    PhantomJ

    Marksman
    Rating - 0%
    0   0   0
    Jun 20, 2008
    236
    18
    Greenwood
    a toothless termite is feeling hungry, so he walks into a bar and says, "Hey where is the bar tender?"
     
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    Floater

    Plinker
    Rating - 0%
    0   0   0
    Mar 8, 2012
    98
    6
    Chesterton
    Dijon vu - the same mustard as before
    Practice safe eating, always use condiments
    I used to be a lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe
    Dancing cheek-to-cheek is really a form of floor play
    Condoms should be used on every conceivable occasion


    I can't believe I actually contributed to this...
     

    Ted

    Shooter
    Rating - 0%
    0   0   0
    Mar 19, 2012
    5,081
    36
    Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, but when they lit a fire in the craft, it sank.

    Proving once again that you can't have your kayak, and heat it too.





    There was a man who sent 10 different puns to friends, hoping that at least one would make them laugh.

    Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
     

    wxchick.h3

    Sharpshooter
    Rating - 0%
    0   0   0
    Apr 22, 2012
    303
    16
    Southern IN
    When you’ve seen one shopping centre you’ve seen a mall.

    It was an emotional wedding. Even the cake was in tiers.

    Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn’t much, but the reception was excellent.

    A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, “I’ll serve you, but don’t start anything.”

    Did you hear about the constipated accountant? He couldn’t budget.
     

    hopper68

    Master
    Rating - 100%
    4   0   0
    Nov 15, 2011
    4,597
    113
    Pike County
    I wanted to be a tailor but the job didn't suit me.
    I would tell you the joke about the roof but it is over your head.
    The joke about the bed has not been made up yet.
    Confused one say, woman who fly upside down have hairy crackup.
    Man caught in cathouse ends up in doghouse.
     

    AllenM

    Diamond Collision Inc. Avon.
    Industry Partner
    Rating - 100%
    133   0   0
    Apr 20, 2008
    10,402
    113
    Avon
    An Irish man a Jew and a horse walk into a bar. The bartender says: is this a joke?
     
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