No longer married!

[daddymikey1975]

My divorce took just under a year. It was finalized last Tuesday. After almost 12 years of marriage, lost trust, lots of stress and uunhappiness, im finally able to move on with life.

I have 4 wonderful children with my ex wife. Due to circumstances, my oldest son lives with me full time, and my other the kids live with me for a week at a time, every other week.

The divorce went exactly theway iI wanted it to. I got what I wanted. She wanted more but accepted my offer.

She said she wanted the divorce so i bought a house. Lol

Overall, I'm very happy with where I'm at in life even though I'm writing new chapters.

Just wanted to share.

 

[LPMan59]

Congrats on your failed marriage!

 

[DRob]

Congrats on being able to put the bad behind you and move on. Keep on being as good a daddymikey as you can.

 

[dieselmudder]

12 years is a long time by most standards now it seems. ive yet to be married, but ive seen them fall apart in as short as 7-9 months. long as your better off because of it is all that matters.

 

[Snapdragon]

Congrats on your failed marriage!

Wow, way to be supportive.

I'm glad things went as well as they could have. Everything that happens to us is a learning experience and, as you said, a chapter. We would not be the same person without each event that has helped to shape us.

 

[gunsisgood]

Booo, sucks for your kids.

 

[Snapdragon]

Booo, sucks for your kids.

Why? Why does this situation have to suck? It all depends on how it is handled. Moving on to a different situation does not have to be a bad experience.

 

[LeeStreet]

Good luck with your new life,move slowly with it.

 

[LPMan59]

Wow, way to be supportive.

I'm glad things went as well as they could have. Everything that happens to us is a learning experience and, as you said, a chapter. We would not be the same person without each event that has helped to shape us.

I am being supportive. The OP is rejoicing in his divorce. Congratulations are in order. Is that not why the thread was started?

ingo confuses me sometimes

 

[LPMan59]

So you neg repped me, snap?

lmfao. Thank god the op has a white knight to defend him from imagined internet enemies.

 

[Snapdragon]

So you neg repped me, snap?

lmfao. Thank god the op has a white knight to defend him from imagined internet enemies.

Sure did, and I'd do it again. I don't get why, when a member is going through such a serious life change, some people feel the need to pile on with negative comments instead of being supportive.

 

[LPMan59]

See post #9

 

[jrainw]

Now is the time for a bachelor party

 

[copo]

Good luck. And glad things went your way.

 

[flatlander]

Don't worry, the 2nd one goes faster and is less expensive

Bob

 

[GodFearinGunTotin]

My divorce took just under a year. It was finalized last Tuesday. After almost 12 years of marriage, lost trust, lots of stress and uunhappiness, im finally able to move on with life.

I have 4 wonderful children with my ex wife. Due to circumstances, my oldest son lives with me full time, and my other the kids live with me for a week at a time, every other week.

The divorce went exactly theway iI wanted it to. I got what I wanted. She wanted more but accepted my offer.

She said she wanted the divorce so i bought a house. Lol

Overall, I'm very happy with where I'm at in life even though I'm writing new chapters.

Just wanted to share.

Though I've never been divorced, my wife has and my brother has. I know that dealing with both, your ex-wife will probably never be totally out of your life--at least while the kids are home. I know that even though you've got this one stressful situation over with, there's more waiting for you for years to come...(ex's new boyfriends, your new girlfriends, custody, child support, holidays, and on and on). You have my virtual-pat-on-the-back for getting this chapter behind you. I'll bet you're feeling relieved. Good luck with your new chapters. My prayers for you and your kids.

 

[jbombelli]

I am being supportive. The OP is rejoicing in his divorce. Congratulations are in order. Is that not why the thread was started?

ingo confuses me sometimes

"Congrats on your failed marriage" is not supportive. It's a snarky little backstab.

 

[daddymikey1975]

Don't worry, the 2nd one goes faster and is less expensive

Bob

THIS made me chuckle

Although, I don't believe I'll get married again.

Though I've never been divorced, my wife has and my brother has. I know that dealing with both, your ex-wife will probably never be totally out of your life--at least while the kids are home. I know that even though you've got this one stressful situation over with, there's more waiting for you for years to come...(ex's new boyfriends, your new girlfriends, custody, child support, holidays, and on and on). You have my virtual-pat-on-the-back for getting this chapter behind you. I'll bet you're feeling relieved. Good luck with your new chapters. My prayers for you and your kids.

I have an older (18 yr old) daughter and am aware that the "Ex" will never be completely gone. I can deal w/ that.

As far as child support, custody, holidays and the like...we enlisted a mediator for issues surrounding the kids. We came to an agreement that allows us both to be parents while maintaining some stability for the children. I didn't want to be a part time dad after almost 12 yrs of being a full time dad.

The house I purchased (almost immediately, even though the process took 4 months) is 6 blocks from where they were already going to school. I wanted to keep them in the same school with the same friends/teachers (less disruption to their lives). This house will also provide for some rental income in a couple years when I get things in order. My mortgage payment is $350/mo in an area that would support $750-$800/mo for rent for this property, in this condition, should I choose to rent it out or become a landlord again.

My work schedule allows me to get them up in the mornings, do breffist, and take them to school, all before I go to work. She picks them up from school and has them for a cople hours until I Get off work. I get them from her and we do our evening/bedtime stuff. It seems to be working quite well.

My 11yr old was having a hard time with my ex not wanting to spend time w/ him or include him in things. He also was being physically beat up by hos older brother (her 14yr old son) so he's been w/ my full time since christmas eve and couldn't he happier. I have him in therapy every other week to help him cope and get through the transition. He seems to be adjusting well. My ex still hasnt taken any initiative to spend time w/ him. She used lack of money as an excuse to not take him to taco bell on nights when I have all of the kids. I offered to give her $10-$15 so she could spend some time w/ him. Still hasnt.

Back story (I'll keep it short): basically, I was a kept man. I was 100% committed to the marriage (in it's entirety, even through her lies and cheating). I was willing to put forth the effort to work through the problems but she claimed she had enough. I told her I would give her anything she wanted but I didn't want a divorce. The only way I would get a divorce is if that's what she wanted. So I gave her what she wanted. (I hope she's happy w/ her decision. I don't care if she is or not, but I hope it's everything she envisioned it would be LOL)

"Congrats on your failed marriage" is not supportive. It's a snarky little backstab.

While I agree with your position, his snarky remark didn't really bother me. Some people are just that way.

To be clear, I'm not celebrating a failed marriage. I'm happy that a toxic situation is behind me and I still get to be a father to my children 50% of the time, whereas most men going through something similar only get 10-15 percent. My kids love me to death, and I wouldn't accept anything less than still shouldering my responsibility of making them meals, cleaning their bedrooms, doing their laundry, taking them places, spending time with them, homework, vomiting at 2am, etc. All of this is my job as well, and embraced it head on and pushed full steam for it. Just don't have to live with, or be bothered or burdened with the ex.

The new chapter is exciting and I'm looking forward to running into the wind head-long.

 

[Dead Duck]

 

[bmbutch]

I'm sorry you & the kids had to go thru all of this, & praying you will all move forward, & find happiness. I wish I was surprised how fast this thread turned into another INGO bash thread, sadly I'm not.