INGO: Joke of the day page

[IndyDave1776]

Ralph and Edna were both patients in a mental hospital. One day while they were walking past the hospital swimming pool, Ralph suddenly jumped into the deep end. He sank to the bottom of the pool and stayed there.

Edna promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled him out. When the Director became aware of Edna's heroic act she immediately ordered her to be discharged from the hospital, as she now considered her to be mentally stable.

When she went to tell Edna the news she said, 'Edna, I have good news and bad news.

The good news is you're being discharged, since you were able to rationally respond to a crisis by jumping in and saving the life of the person you love... I have concluded that your act displays sound mindedness.

The bad news is, Ralph hung himself in the bathroom with his bathrobe belt right after you saved him. I am so sorry, but he's dead.

Edna replied, 'He didn't hang himself, I put him there to dry.

How soon can I go home?'

 

[actaeon277]

The joke is this weather.
I went to work, it was 60.
So I left my coat in the car.

 

[PeaShooter]

And it always comes back to poop.....

Poop jokes aren't my favorite. But they are a solid #2.

 

[IndyTom]

Poop jokes aren't my favorite. But they are a solid #2.

If you're lucky, they're solid, otherwise they might be kind of thin which just isn't funny.

 

[jamil]

If you're lucky, they're solid, otherwise they might be kind of thin which just isn't funny.

I'd say one should hope for a firm #2. Not solid. Not soft. "Firm enough" is a worthy goal.

 

[rhino]

I'd say one should hope for a firm #2. Not solid. Not soft. "Firm enough" is a worthy goal.

I'll have to disagree. Rock hard virtually guarantees minimal cleanup needed afterward. That's worth a little discomfort to me.

 

[Bigtanker]

I'll have to disagree. Rock hard virtually guarantees minimal cleanup needed afterward. That's worth a little discomfort to me.

And there goes THIS thread......right down the crapper.

 

[IndyTom]

I'll have to disagree. Rock hard virtually guarantees minimal cleanup needed afterward. That's worth a little discomfort to me.

They don't have to be rock hard, just like a "ghost gun," a ghost #2 can be untraceable.

 

[sharkey]

They don't have to be rock hard, just like a "ghost gun," a ghost #2 can be untraceable.

You can read 30 magazines before it's done?

 

[IndyTom]

You can read 30 magazines before it's done?

I'd say, only if you had the right clip, but that starts drifting back into poop-knife territory.

 

[ArcadiaGP]

Why did the hipster drown?








He went ice skating on the pond before it was cool

 

[Ericpwp]

That's so Underground.

 

[Spear Dane]

 

[Blacklabsmatter]

ouch!! hahah. What did the easter bunny get for making a basket? 2 pts like everyone else

 

[actaeon277]

 

[Ballstater98]

Why did Smokey the Bear never have any children?

It's because every time Mrs. Smokey got too hot, he smacked her with a shovel.

 

[actaeon277]

 

[jamil]

Oh yeah? Tell that to someone who can't feel their toes.

 

[actaeon277]

 

[actaeon277]

When your buddy asks why you still have a beard after borrowing his trimmer.

[video=youtube;gg1t_nGaDLs]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gg1t_nGaDLs[/video]