Babylon Bee Guide to Choosing the Gun That’s Right for You

[Drewski]

The Babylon Bee Guide To Choosing A Gun That's Right For You

 

[Expat]

I watched Babylon Five recently.

 

[KellyinAvon]

The Babylon Bee Guide To Choosing A Gun That's Right For You

The biggest difference between Pro-2A folks and the antis (aside from reading comprehension)?? We have a sense of humor.

 

[DoggyDaddy]

They were pretty much spot on with the 1911...

1911: An old, old design (the name refers to how it was first made 500 years ago in 1911). This gun is for people who are stuck in the past and don’t care for newfangled things like TikToks and Twitters. No, you shoot those things — you shoot them with your 1911.

Perfect for: Old men who long for the good old days when men were men and there weren't any of these other fake genders.

 

[Drewski]

shotgun: It’s great at close range (though the CDC doesn’t recommend shooting people at close range during a pandemic).

I don’t think the entire season of snl had as much humorous writing as that one line.

 

[Magyars]

Plasma gun? My LGs doesn't have any in stock!
Good read!

 

[Mongo59]

Whatever gun you show an anti-gunner the result is the same, a **** hemorrhage...

 

[Libertarian01]

Plasma gun? My LGs doesn't have any in stock!
Good read!

Hey, just what ya see pal.

 

[BehindBlueI's]

Civil War Cannon: Why waste all that time shooting a bunch of little tiny bullets when you can shoot one big bullet the size of a coconut? This is a great option for the gentleman connoisseur of fine-aged weaponry.

Perfect for: Those with mutton-chop facial hair and a love for exploding things

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.44 Magnum: Do you feel lucky? Well, do ya, punk? More importantly, do you feel like shooting through a car windshield? The .44 magnum is the most powerful handgun in the world... or it was like back in the '70s. There are a lot more large, unwieldy guns to pick from now, but this is a classic.

Perfect for: Cops who get the job done even if they don’t follow all the rules

Sounds like a great primary/BUG set up. Plus with grapeshot, you even have a shotgun. Like a Judge, but one that kills people at distances longer than "contact" to "near contact".

 

[Drewski]

Hey, just what ya see pal.

 

[AtTheMurph]

Sounds like a great primary/BUG set up. Plus with grapeshot, you even have a shotgun. Like a Judge, but one that kills people at distances longer than "contact" to "near contact".

So I knew a guy who had a civil war cannon. On a 4th of July 30 years ago he actually fired it with an actual cannon ball loaded.

Had a large crowd around. He was shooting it into lake where his property was (Pine Lake in WI). Thing goes BANG! and everyone watches for big splash in lake (cleared of boats for the event). No splash and no one can figure out what happened. Obviously not jammed. Maybe ball didn't make much splash? Maybe old ball disintegrated?

Later in day resident on north shore of lake see a large trench in his lawn, approx 8 feet long and 1-2 feet deep. Ball found!

Nunnemacher never lost adventurous spirit