Possible arrangement with the wife

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  • Should she take the deal??


    • Total voters
      0

    GREEN607

    Master
    Rating - 99%
    99   1   0
    Apr 15, 2011
    2,032
    48
    INDIANAPOLIS
    To be clear, I haven't voted in your poll.....and may not (not enough 'options' :D).

    Anyway, I see several ways to go on this. I'll 'qualify' my answer with the fact that I don't like "deal-making" in relationships.... but I've done so, on certain issues, myself. I guess it's part of living with a good woman, sometimes. ;) I'll also offer the info that my wife is not anti-gun either..... in fact for several years, she attended benchrest matches with me on many occassions. Heck, we even spent our 'honeymoon' traveling to Georgia & Alabama, so I could shoot in important matches there (one on Sat, one on Sun). :rockwoot:

    * My wife does hate knives tho..... and I have a passion for good knives (well, OK, most knives :)). I just try not to bring them out and "show off" a new one around her, when I get them.

    If your wife is like a lot of women....... she has umpteen # of shoes. Certainly, shoes cost less than most individual guns. But that's not really the point, is it!? I mean, how many pairs of shoes can one woman possibly "need"?? Make the comparison......shoes-to-guns. She likely won't agree with the comparison, but it's a realistic comparison, in principle. Her: Why do you need another gun? You: Why do you need another closet full of shoes? :cool:

    In all seriousness tho, do you own a 10/22? If not, maybe you could get a 10/22 (there's lots of good used ones around, to be had)......and mount it in a 'tactical' stock format (you can easily do this for $200-$250 total, if you shop around). Take her out to the range, and get her to shoot it (paper targets, soda cans, whatever).... and to shoot it kind of rapid-fire, too. Maybe, once she realizes how fun (and cool) it is...... she'll warm up to the idea of your getting the centerfire version (AR). You could even offer to 'trade' the 10/22 toward the AR purchase.

    I don't actually buy a lot of guns myself, anymore. Money is tight, and I trade guns more often than not (actual trade; or buy one/sell one). But if I were you....... I don't know if I would agree to limit myself to "only one gun in 2 years". That's a decision, only you can make. Who knows..... you may enjoy the AR so much and shoot it enough, that you'll be OK not purchasing another gun for that long.

    I'll tell you one thing. You and your wife already have a good relationship, it would seem. In some relationships......either the wife says, "If you by another gun, I'm leaving." OR, the hubby says, "If I can't buy the guns I want....get out." Be thankful you're not there. :popcorn:
     

    Sylvain

    Grandmaster
    Rating - 100%
    1   0   0
    Nov 30, 2010
    77,313
    113
    Normandy
    Like some other have said, it's a weird kind of deal.
    But if it's all you can do right now to get the gun you want then take it.
    Once you get the gun you will have time to talk to her and make her change her mind about the whole deal.
    If money is tight you will probably not buy a new gun every month anyway, so one every two year may not be that bad of a deal.
    If you can save enough money after you get this gun, and if you can talk to her, maybe in one year you can get another gun.
     

    JohnP82

    Grandmaster
    Rating - 100%
    12   0   0
    Apr 2, 2009
    10,220
    63
    Fort Wayne
    Not a deal I would consider, but then again I am kind of stubborn and buy what I want. Maybe that is why I am single :dunno: :D

    I would just try talking with her more about it and see if you two can agree on something that works for both of you.
     

    EPD1102

    Sharpshooter
    Rating - 100%
    5   0   0
    Nov 1, 2010
    404
    16
    Evansville
    If you spend your money responsibly and can afford the gun(s) you want, you should be able to get them. Do you put time restrictions on other purchases such as shoes, clothes, etc.? How many pairs of shoes does your wife have that aren't worn out but she has still bought more? How many pairs of jeans that are all similar and all in good shape but she still has multiple pairs?
     

    Bunnykid68

    Grandmaster
    Rating - 100%
    22   0   0
    Mar 2, 2010
    23,515
    83
    Cave of Caerbannog
    Since you were asking if it would be a good deal for her, I voted yes. You offer not to buy a gun for another 2 years and you get what you want now without an argument and during that time you get to continue to get her used to it.
     

    hoosierdoc

    Freed prisoner
    Rating - 100%
    8   0   0
    Apr 27, 2011
    25,987
    149
    Galt's Gulch
    If it's a budget thing, she's being responsible to limit hobby purchases when money is tight. If not, then you guys can work out the "comfortable" part of things. I agree with others, don't make deals as a routine. Then you both do things the other person knows you don't want to do. Ideally she'll never know you don't like ballroom dancing if she enjoys it.
     

    jason765

    Sharpshooter
    Rating - 100%
    3   0   0
    Apr 25, 2011
    483
    16
    Henry County
    If she agrees, go for it. chances are she wont make you stick to the 2 year thing anyway, of course I dont know your wife but my wife would know the 2 year thing is big fat lie.
     

    drgnrobo

    Expert
    Rating - 100%
    11   0   0
    Mar 9, 2009
    1,493
    2
    ft. wayne
    Dont make promises you cant keep,I would try to get her to go to the range with you & explain what a great stress reliever it is & that it is a fun family activity ( I have an angry mob in my house if I try to sneak to the range by myself anymore)
     

    Mike_Indy

    Sharpshooter
    Rating - 0%
    0   0   0
    Mar 31, 2009
    592
    18
    Indianapolis
    I keep saying that I am done buying guns. "I have what I need." I've not made it 6 months over the past two years before buying another one. In light of that such a promise as you are proposing would pretty much be a lie.
    Don't do it. You WILL want another and when that day comes you will have an issue between you and your wife.
     

    Que

    Meekness ≠ Weakness
    Site Supporter
    Rating - 98%
    48   1   0
    Feb 20, 2009
    16,373
    83
    Blacksburg
    She said to sell my G30 and then I could get another gun but my G30 is my EDC......

    I recall posting a similar thread months ago and I got replies suggesting I get a divorce because my wife was the devil, to those who implied I was a weak man for listening to the desires of my wife. Well, you get what you pay for. :rolleyes:

    You know your wife better than anyone. My only point is that if you make the promise, you should keep it. Your wife may appreciate this and maybe she won't; only you know. It took me a long time to help my wife reach a level of comfort about guns. I hope everything works out for you.

    From a tactically reasonably point of view, you may want to keep your EDC, though.
     

    IndianaSigma

    Sharpshooter
    Rating - 0%
    0   0   0
    Oct 18, 2011
    575
    16
    Huntington, IN
    As long as you stick to the deal.....you'll be alright. I'd make that deal! Just make sure to stick to your word or it will cause tension between the two of you.
     

    jayhawk

    Expert
    Rating - 100%
    3   0   0
    Jul 16, 2009
    1,194
    48
    Fort Wayne, IN
    I think it sounds like a great deal. It shows that you respect her feelings and are willing to make a sacrifice, but you still get what you want (at least partially)...it's compromise. You each need to be able to feel okay to be your own person to an extent.
     

    Sigasaurus

    Sharpshooter
    Rating - 100%
    111   0   0
    Apr 6, 2011
    496
    16
    Plainfield
    My wife was anti guns. She quit complaining about it after about number 13. Just come home with it and when she gets angry just watch the nightly news together and politely tell her this is the reason I own guns. It worked for me. I mean hell I even have a room dedicated to reloading and AR builds now. (She got tired of me working on them at the kitchen table)
     

    jayhawk

    Expert
    Rating - 100%
    3   0   0
    Jul 16, 2009
    1,194
    48
    Fort Wayne, IN
    I think this situation calls for a lot more open, clear communication.

    You shouldn't have to resort to making deals to get what you want; it's one sign of an unhealthy relationship. Talk to each other until you're both on the same page. Even if you don't get the gun you want this time, you'll be better off in the long run.

    True.
     
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