Im sick of the yelling & im just done

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  • 55fairlane

    Master
    Rating - 100%
    4   0   0
    Jan 15, 2016
    2,262
    113
    New Haven
    I'm just done. After 54 years of being yelled in just F'ing done. I can't take anymore.
    My wife is hormonal & that doesn't help things. Today we went to buy her a new car, we got farther then I thought, looked at 2 cars, didn't like the sales person or the car, my wife has a melt down like a 3 year has, starts crying & studdering then spends next 3 hours yelling at me. And none of it makes any sense to me. All I did was you asked me to do & now your reaming my are for it? Omg I have enough.
    4 hours of her yelling. And it's going in circles trying to reason with her is impossible. The yelling has got to stop.
    As a child about all I remember is my mother yelling at me, constantly, my teachers yelling at, and that in turn caused my mother to yell at me more, that went on until my father stepped up and intervened by beating me for Christ knows what.
    I was a happy go lucky kid but the world fixed that. Thank you F'ing world. My favorite line was "if you don't why I'm mad at you, I'm not telling you" F'ing love that one.
    My ex wife yelled at me, told me I hurt her feeling one to many times, I asked, then she told me "if you don't know I'm not telling you" it's been over 15 years sense my divorce & sense I have seen my oldest daughter.
    My wife can't make coffee, can't clean , I cook every meal I the house, can't get oil changed, can't do the lawn care, can't take care of her dogs, but can & will spend hours reaming me over how I'm doing it wrong, then yells at because I show her no affection.....F no, not after being yelled like I'm some sort of little bitch.
    Everything was more impressive to my father, then I was, I got yelled at at the F'ing football game cause I didn't like it, I got yelled at family holidays because I I didn't like the football game, it didn't matter, they did, now shut up. I got yelled at because if I just liked football the other kids would like me.
    The art teacher yelled at my because I'm so un artistic I can't even draw a stick figure. The middle school principal yelled at because I didn't want to participate in football or athletics, my father yelled at my over this also.
    My little brother smashed some flying wood airplanes I made (about the only thing I found true happiness in) my father yelled at because A) if I lived football I wouldn't play with airplanes B) no one got anywhere playing with airplanes...I said what about Grissom, Sheppard, Edward's & the guy from down the street (Neil) Armstrong? I got beat for that one. But not to worry I got yelled at because my father was not in the mood to now go and worship his lawn.

    I suppose you have had enough of my whining & have your li,es to attend to, instead of listening to a 54 year old, alcoholic, man with issues about being yelled at.
    Please say a pray for my wife & youngest daughter.
     

    55fairlane

    Master
    Rating - 100%
    4   0   0
    Jan 15, 2016
    2,262
    113
    New Haven
    You have no idea what it's like, to be in room & hear the adults whisper about how I'm to smart for my own good, the yell at me about how stupid I'm cause I don't understand there feelings or some such thing......
     

    patience0830

    .22 magician
    Site Supporter
    Rating - 96.6%
    28   1   0
    Nov 3, 2008
    17,960
    149
    Not far from the tree
    I'd know better how to respond if I knew whether she'd driven you to drink again. Hang in. Sounds like an abusive co-dependent relationship and it's typical for abused folks to end up that way. Get some professional help if you can. Preferrably b4 someone does something you can't fix. I got yelled at plenty as a young man too. Gotta rise above. Tough row to hoe.
     

    55fairlane

    Master
    Rating - 100%
    4   0   0
    Jan 15, 2016
    2,262
    113
    New Haven
    I'd know better how to respond if I knew whether she'd driven you to drink again. Hang in. Sounds like an abusive co-dependent relationship and it's typical for abused folks to end up that way. Get some professional help if you can. Preferrably b4 someone does something you can't fix. I got yelled at plenty as a young man too. Gotta rise above. Tough row to hoe.
    No sir, still sober. She ( my wife) & my youngest daughter are the reason I dried out, and the reason I will stay sober.
    Thank you my friend
     

    CindyE

    Master
    Rating - 100%
    7   0   0
    Jul 19, 2011
    3,034
    113
    north/central IN
    I'm just done. After 54 years of being yelled in just F'ing done. I can't take anymore.
    My wife is hormonal & that doesn't help things. Today we went to buy her a new car, we got farther then I thought, looked at 2 cars, didn't like the sales person or the car, my wife has a melt down like a 3 year has, starts crying & studdering then spends next 3 hours yelling at me. And none of it makes any sense to me. All I did was you asked me to do & now your reaming my are for it? Omg I have enough.
    4 hours of her yelling. And it's going in circles trying to reason with her is impossible. The yelling has got to stop.
    As a child about all I remember is my mother yelling at me, constantly, my teachers yelling at, and that in turn caused my mother to yell at me more, that went on until my father stepped up and intervened by beating me for Christ knows what.
    I was a happy go lucky kid but the world fixed that. Thank you F'ing world. My favorite line was "if you don't why I'm mad at you, I'm not telling you" F'ing love that one.
    My ex wife yelled at me, told me I hurt her feeling one to many times, I asked, then she told me "if you don't know I'm not telling you" it's been over 15 years sense my divorce & sense I have seen my oldest daughter.
    My wife can't make coffee, can't clean , I cook every meal I the house, can't get oil changed, can't do the lawn care, can't take care of her dogs, but can & will spend hours reaming me over how I'm doing it wrong, then yells at because I show her no affection.....F no, not after being yelled like I'm some sort of little bitch.
    Everything was more impressive to my father, then I was, I got yelled at at the F'ing football game cause I didn't like it, I got yelled at family holidays because I I didn't like the football game, it didn't matter, they did, now shut up. I got yelled at because if I just liked football the other kids would like me.
    The art teacher yelled at my because I'm so un artistic I can't even draw a stick figure. The middle school principal yelled at because I didn't want to participate in football or athletics, my father yelled at my over this also.
    My little brother smashed some flying wood airplanes I made (about the only thing I found true happiness in) my father yelled at because A) if I lived football I wouldn't play with airplanes B) no one got anywhere playing with airplanes...I said what about Grissom, Sheppard, Edward's & the guy from down the street (Neil) Armstrong? I got beat for that one. But not to worry I got yelled at because my father was not in the mood to now go and worship his lawn.

    I suppose you have had enough of my whining & have your li,es to attend to, instead of listening to a 54 year old, alcoholic, man with issues about being yelled at.
    Please say a pray for my wife & youngest daughter.
    Emotional and verbal abuse is really harmful. I know. Have you ever been to counseling? Not couples counseling. Individual for you, and for her, if she's willing.
     

    55fairlane

    Master
    Rating - 100%
    4   0   0
    Jan 15, 2016
    2,262
    113
    New Haven
    Emotional and verbal abuse is really harmful. I know. Have you ever been to counseling? Not couples counseling. Individual for you, and for her, if she's willing.
    She can't see a counselor, she has no time, this one or that one isn't right, she's not driving across town....nothing is right for her.
    Me I'm done with counselor....the 1 saw when I 12/13 rated me out to my dad who beat me for it.
    The one I saw when I was 16 had me committed to a mental heath care ward....the other "guests " beat me....I wasn't a druggie or a drunk
    The one my ex wife set me up with cared more about his golf game then his patients. The one I saw when my wife was divorcing me, leid to me.....
     

    CindyE

    Master
    Rating - 100%
    7   0   0
    Jul 19, 2011
    3,034
    113
    north/central IN
    She can't see a counselor, she has no time, this one or that one isn't right, she's not driving across town....nothing is right for her.
    Me I'm done with counselor....the 1 saw when I 12/13 rated me out to my dad who beat me for it.
    The one I saw when I was 16 had me committed to a mental heath care ward....the other "guests " beat me....I wasn't a druggie or a drunk
    The one my ex wife set me up with cared more about his golf game then his patients. The one I saw when my wife was divorcing me, leid to me.....
    that sucks. i didn't have success with counseling when i was a kid, either. i had much better luck with the one i went to as an adult, years later. It is hard to find the right one for you. I read lots of self-help books, too. Some are garbage, some are really helpful. Unfortunately, a lot of them are geared more toward women. Has your wife always been like this, or is this something recent?
    I don't think my family life growing up was as bad as yours. I know my parents loved us, but i grew up thinking it was normal to yell, throw things, and manipulate to get your way. Took me a while to figure out that isn't the way...
     

    Cameramonkey

    www.thechosen.tv
    Staff member
    Moderator
    Site Supporter
    Rating - 100%
    35   0   0
    May 12, 2013
    31,955
    77
    Camby area
    Hang in there, buddy. And dont give up on the counseling. If she says she is just too busy, it may take a pointed statement like "Well, if our relationship is important to you, then you probably need to find the time and push something that is less important than our relationship out of the way to make the time. Or we probably wont have a relationship."
     

    patience0830

    .22 magician
    Site Supporter
    Rating - 96.6%
    28   1   0
    Nov 3, 2008
    17,960
    149
    Not far from the tree
    Hang in there, buddy. And dont give up on the counseling. If she says she is just too busy, it may take a pointed statement like "Well, if our relationship is important to you, then you probably need to find the time and push something that is less important than our relationship out of the way to make the time. Or we probably wont have a relationship."
    Yup. Sometimes you have to follow through with the "or else". Sux, but there it is.
     

    55fairlane

    Master
    Rating - 100%
    4   0   0
    Jan 15, 2016
    2,262
    113
    New Haven
    You know when I was younger say 12 or 13, a good day is when I didn't get shamed or yelled at, a better day was when the kids at school didn't make my life a living hell, an awesome day was when my father did not beat me.
    As a kid I keep my head down and didn't speak or play with others, trying hard to avoid anyone or anything that might cause the yelling.
    I would retreat to my room cry a while and slip into a dream of airplane and all things mechanical, a world I felt safe on, a world my father that was for looser. To day I go to my machine shop in the garage, stare at pictures of race cars, time slips, pictures of the greats, Rudolph Diesel, Nicola Tesla, George Westinghouse.....drink a coffee and start a steam engine......today's engine Elmer's scotty scotch yoke engine the first picture is a finished engine a buddy built 5a15533125c714d4a40f5a1bd608b92f.jpg Resized_PART_1710539507546_Resized_20240310_170347.jpeg Resized_PART_1710539507405_Resized_20240314_192030.jpeg
     
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