You know you live in a small town in the midwest when...

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  • rudyman

    Marksman
    Rating - 0%
    0   0   0
    Nov 7, 2009
    208
    28
    dekalb co.
    Went on a long weekend trip with friends over New year's ( Thurs to Mon) . Got in late Monday,took Tuesday off from work to catch up. Stopped at p.o. box and got mail. Had a package ,they leave a key to a "locker" in lobby,no postmaster for half the day. So grab my package(chocolate covered pecans!!) and apparently left my keys in the po box. Received several text and a call from people telling me I left my key in said box. One person offered to take them out of my box and give them to her neighbor, a coworker of mine . I thanked them all and said I will just pick them up on my way to work. I grabbed them this am at 6:30. Still there hanging in lock .... Been smiling ever since..
     

    DoggyDaddy

    Grandmaster
    Site Supporter
    Rating - 100%
    73   0   1
    Aug 18, 2011
    102,052
    77
    Southside Indy
    Went on a long weekend trip with friends over New year's ( Thurs to Mon) . Got in late Monday,took Tuesday off from work to catch up. Stopped at p.o. box and got mail. Had a package ,they leave a key to a "locker" in lobby,no postmaster for half the day. So grab my package(chocolate covered pecans!!) and apparently left my keys in the po box. Received several text and a call from people telling me I left my key in said box. One person offered to take them out of my box and give them to her neighbor, a coworker of mine . I thanked them all and said I will just pick them up on my way to work. I grabbed them this am at 6:30. Still there hanging in lock .... Been smiling ever since..
    I live on the southside of Indy, but I had to go to the post office today to get stamps and mail something. My plan was to use the self-serve kiosk to buy the stamps.

    I waited behind a guy that was talking on his phone (via earbuds or bluetooth, which freaks me out) that was weighing an envelope, buying a label for that, and buying stamps all while carrying on a conversation with an invisible person.

    He finally finished and I started my stamp buying transaction. I got a message on the screen telling me to remove my card before starting a new transaction. Then I realized that guy had left his card in the machine. When I removed it, then my transaction started.

    Since I had already started my transaction, I turned around and asked a lady that had come in behind me if she could catch the guy and give him his card back. She did, and got his card back to him.

    So, not all us big city folks are bad. :)
     

    WhitleyStu

    Keep'em Scary Sharp!!!
    Rating - 100%
    11   0   0
    Feb 11, 2009
    1,466
    63
    Whitley County/Allen County

    You know you live in a small town in the Midwest when... I mosquito fog the front of the house so I we can sit on the front porch in comfort then multiple cars come up the driveway so see if the house is on fire. So many good Samaritans that there is a minor traffic jam in our driveway... God, I love this place!!!

     

    Route 45

    Grandmaster
    Rating - 100%
    92   0   0
    Dec 5, 2015
    14,884
    113
    Indy
    I live in the city. Today I saw an abandoned church with broken windows and graffiti on the front door. Somebody flipped the cross in the window upside down. Went to Walmart and saw 3 fights, a 300 lb chick wearing a thong and halter top combo, and a traffic jam of electric mobility scooters in Aisle 32. The militant Karen at the door got angry and tried to grab me because I told her to **** off when she demanded to see my receipt. I left my empty shopping cart in the parking space.

    On my way home, I had to draw my GLock when a dude tried to carjack me. You know, one of THOSE guys. Anyway, I was able to speed off and get away. I think I hit a homeless guy or a feral dog or something as I swerved across the lane, but no damage to my Prius, so I didn't stop. Was hungry, so I swung by that old car wash that is now a BBQ rib place/vape shop and got some food. Really nice folks there, one of the girls standing in line offered to do anything I asked her to do, for only $50. She's coming over later to paint my shed.

    Almost home. Saw a cat humping a dog in the front yard of a house that still had their Biden/Harris sign up. Pulled into my drive and saw that my neighbor still hasn't mowed his lawn. I don't really know him, but he must have a lot of friends, because there are people visiting him all hours of the day and night. His son lives in a camper in the backyard, I think his name is Narcan or something like that, if I heard it correctly.

    Anyway, I was looking for someone with welding experience to make me some bars for my windows. Taxes are outrageous here, so I don't have a lot of cash, but I've got a nice Lorcin .25 auto and a slightly used bong flower vase as partial trade, if interested.
     

    deo62

    Master
    Site Supporter
    Rating - 100%
    18   0   0
    Apr 8, 2009
    3,199
    113
    Peru
    I live in the city. Today I saw an abandoned church with broken windows and graffiti on the front door. Somebody flipped the cross in the window upside down. Went to Walmart and saw 3 fights, a 300 lb chick wearing a thong and halter top combo, and a traffic jam of electric mobility scooters in Aisle 32. The militant Karen at the door got angry and tried to grab me because I told her to **** off when she demanded to see my receipt. I left my empty shopping cart in the parking space.

    On my way home, I had to draw my GLock when a dude tried to carjack me. You know, one of THOSE guys. Anyway, I was able to speed off and get away. I think I hit a homeless guy or a feral dog or something as I swerved across the lane, but no damage to my Prius, so I didn't stop. Was hungry, so I swung by that old car wash that is now a BBQ rib place/vape shop and got some food. Really nice folks there, one of the girls standing in line offered to do anything I asked her to do, for only $50. She's coming over later to paint my shed.

    Almost home. Saw a cat humping a dog in the front yard of a house that still had their Biden/Harris sign up. Pulled into my drive and saw that my neighbor still hasn't mowed his lawn. I don't really know him, but he must have a lot of friends, because there are people visiting him all hours of the day and night. His son lives in a camper in the backyard, I think his name is Narcan or something like that, if I heard it correctly.

    Anyway, I was looking for someone with welding experience to make me some bars for my windows. Taxes are outrageous here, so I don't have a lot of cash, but I've got a nice Lorcin .25 auto and a slightly used bong flower vase as partial trade, if interested.
    Must’ve been Tuesday…
     

    ghuns

    Grandmaster
    Rating - 100%
    2   0   0
    Nov 22, 2011
    9,308
    113
    You know you live in the country when you take this pic on your road...

    foJMvWSl.jpg


    We corralled the girl into the neighbors pasture. Again, this is the country. If somebody had a longhorn, especially a cow that was nursing, within 10 miles, we'd know about it.

    Everybody for miles around posted and shared on Facebook, neighbor hung flyers in every feed mill around, nobody ever came to get her. This was several years ago and he still has her out in the pasture with his Angus cows.
     

    Nugget

    Milsurp Enjoyer
    Rating - 100%
    8   0   0
    Jul 30, 2022
    614
    93
    Morgan County
    You know you live in the country when you take this pic on your road...

    foJMvWSl.jpg


    We corralled the girl into the neighbors pasture. Again, this is the country. If somebody had a longhorn, especially a cow that was nursing, within 10 miles, we'd know about it.

    Everybody for miles around posted and shared on Facebook, neighbor hung flyers in every feed mill around, nobody ever came to get her. This was several years ago and he still has her out in the pasture with his Angus cows.
    I had an encounter like this in high school. Twas before everyone carried a high res camera in their pocket, so no pix. Was on my way to play golf in my tiny little Chevy Cavalier, and came upon several cows standing along side the road. They had apparently broken thru the fence. I was dumb, so I decided to drive slowly past them. Cows never look quite so big as when you're driving past them in a Cavalier, looking UP at them!
     

    ghuns

    Grandmaster
    Rating - 100%
    2   0   0
    Nov 22, 2011
    9,308
    113
    I had an encounter like this in high school. Twas before everyone carried a high res camera in their pocket, so no pix. Was on my way to play golf in my tiny little Chevy Cavalier, and came upon several cows standing along side the road. They had apparently broken thru the fence. I was dumb, so I decided to drive slowly past them. Cows never look quite so big as when you're driving past them in a Cavalier, looking UP at them!
    I helped retrieve countless cattle and horses that escaped neighbors fences. I just can't imagine loosing a longhorn and not tracking it down.
     

    Timjoebillybob

    Grandmaster
    Rating - 100%
    1   0   0
    Feb 27, 2009
    9,364
    149
    I helped retrieve countless cattle and horses that escaped neighbors fences. I just can't imagine loosing a longhorn and not tracking it down.
    Loose horse or cow isn't that uncommon around here, the roaming Kangaroo was though. I was driving down I-65 with my mom once and there was a cow grazing in the median, this was before cell phones were common. We stopped at the next exit and contacted the police. Dispatch started laughing when I told her, until she realized I wasn't joking. I've hit a deer going about 50MPH I'd hate to see what a cow at 70 would be like.
     

    ghuns

    Grandmaster
    Rating - 100%
    2   0   0
    Nov 22, 2011
    9,308
    113
    ...I've hit a deer going about 50MPH I'd hate to see what a cow at 70 would be like.
    Both me and my younger brother have hit horses. Hazzard of living in Amish country I guess.

    Although technically, the horse hit my brother and I did hit an Englishman's horse. Both horses faired better than our trucks.

    Neighbor with dairy cows had a Holstein get smoked out on the road. The volume of blood in a pregnant cow is staggering. It looked like a Rob Zombie directed horror movie had filmed there.
     

    Timjoebillybob

    Grandmaster
    Rating - 100%
    1   0   0
    Feb 27, 2009
    9,364
    149
    Both me and my younger brother have hit horses. Hazzard of living in Amish country I guess.

    Although technically, the horse hit my brother and I did hit an Englishman's horse. Both horses faired better than our trucks.

    Neighbor with dairy cows had a Holstein get smoked out on the road. The volume of blood in a pregnant cow is staggering. It looked like a Rob Zombie directed horror movie had filmed there.
    I used to work with a guy that ran over a cow in a camaro. Yes ran over. The cow had been hit by a large truck shortly before and he was driving down the road doing 50-60 mph and saw the hazard lights. Being an idiot (yes the guy was an idiot) rather than slow down he just swung over into the other lane to pass and that's when he saw the cow laying there. Ramped the cow, he kept driving the camaro until spring hit and it started warming up. Turns out taking a car through the car wash belly bath won't get rid of all the blood and meat wedged into the crevices.
     

    Mij

    Grandmaster
    Site Supporter
    Rating - 100%
    1   0   0
    May 22, 2022
    5,867
    113
    In the corn and beans
    When you get home from work to find a note on your door from the town Marshal telling you Mary wants you at the Post Office right now. You get there and the doors are all propped open and you can smell your trapping lures when you get out of the truck. Mary tells you, you can pick up your package on the back loading dock, NOW! With a really angry look on her face.
     

    daddyusmaximus

    Grandmaster
    Rating - 98.8%
    82   1   0
    Aug 21, 2013
    8,508
    113
    Remington
    Went on a long weekend trip with friends over New year's ( Thurs to Mon) . Got in late Monday,took Tuesday off from work to catch up. Stopped at p.o. box and got mail. Had a package ,they leave a key to a "locker" in lobby,no postmaster for half the day. So grab my package(chocolate covered pecans!!) and apparently left my keys in the po box. Received several text and a call from people telling me I left my key in said box. One person offered to take them out of my box and give them to her neighbor, a coworker of mine . I thanked them all and said I will just pick them up on my way to work. I grabbed them this am at 6:30. Still there hanging in lock .... Been smiling ever since..
    Small towns... people know you, and what box is who's.
    I walk in to get my mail, and fins a "yellow card" in the box... indicating a package too big to fit.
    OK, now I have to go into the office area to turn in my card, and get it from behind the counter.
    By the time I get in there, they have my box waiting at the counter.
    Saw me come in the lobby...


    And yeah... I've had to come back for my keys before too... lol.
     
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