Military BS Stories or the last liar wins.

[KellyinAvon]

If you've heard this one before, don't stop me. I want to hear it again

Sometime in 1993: young USAF SSgt KellyinAvon is a Supply Troop at Taegu Air Base, RoK and is one of the 27 Blue Suiters on a Korean Air Force Base.

One day I borrowed the Aerospace Ground Equipment (AGE) Superintendent's government vehicle (GOV). Not sure where our 1/2 ton Chevy pickup or 1-ton Chevy flat-bed was, but I borrowed Ken's pickup. It was an (IIRC) a 1988 Chevy S-10 with a 2.8L fuel injected V-6 (had the badge below the grill.) Fuel injected V-6 in an S-10? This thing should get up and go. It did not, I mean it was running awful. When I got back I told him that it was running like complete ****. He had just got it back from vehicle maintenance, who were Korean Contractors.

Now this was before we had an old boy from Tennessee who was an actual mechanic as the contract quality assurance evaluator. We had a fleet manager schnook (who didn't know a torque wrench from a cutting torch) masquerading as a Vehicle Maintenance NCO so the fleet pretty much was ****. Don't get me wrong, the AGE maintenance contractors were really good. The Civil Engineering contractors were really good. The WRM contractors were really good. The ROKAF Munitions Maintenance Troops who maintained our WRM munitions were awesome. The Vehicle Maintenance contractors SUCKED CANAL WATER!!

The next day Ken (who I also ran into in Qatar in 2005, but that's another post) comes into the Supply Office. He asks me if I could order the spark plugs for his truck so he could change them. That was the easiest thing I did that day, maybe a week later we got the plugs in.

After we got the spark plugs in he came in later that day. It was running so bad because it had three different spark plugs, and they were all wrong!!

It was so great when we got an actual mechanic as a Vehicle Maintenance NCO. He rode the contractors hard every day and actually got them to do their jobs.

 

[actaeon277]

 

[KellyinAvon]

View attachment 206261

Looks like the kid has a star on his Iraqi Campaign Medal and a NATO Medal

Not sure what the E-9's (yeah I went there, a Chief wouldn't be touching the ribbon rack) doing, maybe the Small Arms Expert Ribbon is confusing him.

 

[nonobaddog]

If he isn't careful he might wake up that first guy.

 

[actaeon277]

Love it.

Made a comment on a reacter watching Chernobyl, and a person asked me if I was an expert on RBMK reactors.

Well, specifically RBMK, no.
But I was Reactor Operator on S5W and S8G reactors. And xenon plays a part on all reactors. So, yes I understand xenon curves very well and had to plan for them.

Sigh.
Why do I bother.

 

[Nazgul]

Kelly's comment about "Blue Suits" reminded me. On the ship in the Virginia Capes Operating Area, Bermuda Triangle , they had a ship wide inspection. Brought on Blue Suits who were experts in a certain area, they were civilians and military. I was assigned to an Air Force major who was inspecting the physical security on the entire ship.
Every morning I went to a secure area and had an armored breifcase handcuffed to my wrist, just like the movies. I had the proper security clearance and carried a loaded 1911 and radio. It contained the plans/etc he needed to check everything. Interesting week.
During this inspection it required him to be on the bridge of the ship while we were underway. It was the only time I was there while we were operating. Beautiful day, clear water and moving slowly. I noticed people were looking over the Starboard side, even the helmsman. So I moved a couple feet over to see what was attracting their attention. There was a huge hammerhead shark cruising alongside us. It had to be close to 15'-20' long. Not sure how big they can get but it was impressive. The Captain suggested a swim call......
Ate chow one day with an older guy in a blue suit, a civilian. He was on a ship that ran the gauntlet to Murmansk in WW2. He had some interesting stories. Manned a twin 50 mount and fought off the Stuka's several times. Got torpedoed once but they were able to stay on course. He said you could tell if a bomb was headed towards you when it didn't look like it was moving. If it seemed to just hang in the air it was headed straight at you.

Don

 

[actaeon277]

NOT B.S.

Just some news.

US Navy's New Destroyer: John Basilone :: Guns.com

This month, the United States Navy christened a new destroyer fittingly tied to one of the U.S. Marine Corps’ most beloved machine gunners of World War II, John Basilone.

www.guns.com

 

[actaeon277]

 

[actaeon277]

 

[actaeon277]

 

[repeter1977]

 

[actaeon277]

Twice my sub was forced to stay on the surface during BAD storms. (While I was on)
BAD!

Coincidentally, I was seasick twice on the sub.

Below periscope depth, it's like you're on land. Except the "building" tilts up/down, left/right. But no up/down motion.

But, on the surface.... well subs are designed for under the water, NOT on top of the water.
It was like watching Das Boot. And normally, we had it MUCH better than them.

The waves try to roll your boat over.
It rolls to one side, then back. With so much force, men were thrown out of their bunks injuring them, mostly bruises, cuts and such.
So, some tried to sleep on the deck, those that could.
Sometimes the roll would go so far, and at the end pause so long, you'd wonder if she'd keep rolling.
Topside, the waves would crash over you, and try to wash you over the side.
Got so bad, we had to pull the topside watch down (OOD and lookouts).

Maintained a lookout through the periscopes.
But the waves would wash OVER the periscopes, even though they were extended and we were on the surface.

And, before the watch was brought below, it was wicked cold.
Nut freezing cold.

 

[nonobaddog]

Twice my sub was forced to stay on the surface during BAD storms. (While I was on)
BAD!

Why were you forced to stay on the surface with a nuclear sub?

 

[actaeon277]

Why were you forced to stay on the surface with a nuclear sub?

We were in transit where it was not advised to submerge.

 

[nonobaddog]

We were in transit where it was not advised to submerge.

Too shallow? Underwater volcanoes?

 

[actaeon277]

Too shallow? Underwater volcanoes?

I think it was a high traffic, shallow area. A shipping lane outside port.

 

[Hawkeye]

Too shallow? Underwater volcanoes?

I think US Nucs generally surface at the 100 fathom line when transiting to a port. (Maybe its 100 meter). On the east coast this can lead to somewhat long surface transits to a port. In the Pacific, it can just be a few miles. @actaeon277 may be able to verify this.

 

[Dave A]

Service ages you.
Duh.


You're lucky. When I was 22, I dated an 18 year old.
Shipmate told me, I was robbing the cradle.
I said, she's over 18.
And he replied, what are you... 30?


geez

That's what you get for not checking your dosimeter.

 

[actaeon277]

I think US Nucs generally surface at the 100 fathom line when transiting to a port. (Maybe its 100 meter). On the east coast this can lead to somewhat long surface transits to a port. In the Pacific, it can just be a few miles. @actaeon277 may be able to verify this.

Travel to Norfolk, we were surfaced over 4 hours to get to the dive point.
Outside Puerto Rico, we just cleared the deck, sealed the hatches, and dove withing eyesight of the port. One of the sailors got a good pic of it from shore.

 

[actaeon277]

That's what you get for not checking your dosimeter.

When we were in port, and shut down, I was okay.
But when we were running, I exceeded the monthly limit set by my sub, almost every month.