-1 UPS

[paddling_man]

UPS, you feckless weasel. My relatively pricey item was loaded onto your truck as "out for delivery" last Friday. The ETA for delivery was between 5-7pm. You never showed. Was it something I said?

I gave you another chance and, like a midlife crisis suffering absentee father, you said again "out for delivery" and would be at my doorstep by 5-7pm Saturday. Once Weekend Update began to air, I understand I was again lost to your other, more lusty pursuits.

My hopes were slim for Monday but again, you stated "out for delivery" and that you would see me between 5pm & 7pm. By 730pm, my loving wife became concerned that my paranoia was in full swing as I kept returning to the front window to peer out.

By 2100, you left me a heartless "Rescheduled" email notice and I was left sad and neglected, like Monday's Child.

Today is now Tuesday.

You've emailed me to say - once again - that my package will arrive between 1700-1900. However, the UPS website knows you better than yourself and is making no claims to your false fidelity and hollow promises:



I have an idea... if your route is so overloaded that the deliveries at the end of the route can't be met consecutive days in a row, how about you run the damn route in reverse every other day, you worthless piece of crap.

Don't even get me started when you leave a website message that the delivery failed because "no code for community access gate"... there is no gate.

-1 UPS. If you went on strike, how would we be able to tell??

-1 Burger King, just because.

 

[Ark]

Item, or firearm?

 

[paddling_man]

Item in this case. Value about $400. Not life changing but irritating.

 

[Ark]

Item in this case. Value about $400. Not life changing but irritating.

Ah. Then you can't do any of the firearm specific actions that light a fire under UPS.

 

[Aszerigan]

+1 for the Burger King reference.

 

[paddling_man]

Pro Tip: If you are on the Virtual Chat Bot from UPS and you type: "you suck," the bot transfers you to a live person. :-)

Person contacted driver who laid hands on the package in truck. Assured me that it will be delivered today. Gave reason for three days "out for delivery" but not happening because the package "was scanned to be put on truck three times but never made it onto the truck." Hmmm... -1.

 

[DeadeyeChrista'sdad]

Pro Tip: If you are on the Virtual Chat Bot from UPS and you type: "you suck," the bot transfers you to a live person. :-)

Person contacted driver who laid hands on the package in truck. Assured me that it will be delivered today. Gave reason for three days "out for delivery" but not happening because the package "was scanned to be put on truck three times but never made it onto the truck." Hmmm... -1.

Sounds like further weaselry to me...

 

[paddling_man]

Sounds like further weaselry to me...

Agreed.

 

[snapping turtle]

+1 for the Burger King reference.

I hear 430 million doll hairs are going to be spent to bring back the whopper to prominence. kitchen and dining room upgrades. Advertising ect.
FOB fresh off the broiler and have it your way has been long lost starting in the late 1980’’s.


and ”I once got busy in Burger King bathroom”

 

[WebSnyper]

and ”I once got busy in Burger King bathroom”

 

[patience0830]

Lazy UPS corksacker drops mine out by the road at the end of my 1800 foot driveway. That truck fits through the gate, you lazy union *******.

 

[deo62]

Don’t keep us in suspense-did it show up?

 

[paddling_man]

The weasel has landed. The UPS website said something like 'calculating new delivery time" all day.

"To err is human. To cover it up is weasel." Scott Adams.

-1 UPS, for having it your way for three days.

 

[2A-Hoosier23]

Lazy UPS corksacker drops mine out by the road at the end of my 1800 foot driveway. That truck fits through the gate, you lazy union *******.

Have any signage? Even though common sense says this shouldn't happen, UPS and other guys would do the same at my old employer's business until we put up a sign at the end of the driveway, "All [address] deliveries here" with a big arrow pointing down the driveway. Haven't had one since

 

[patience0830]

Have any signage? Even though common sense says this shouldn't happen, UPS and other guys would do the same at my old employer's business until we put up a sign at the end of the driveway, "All [address] deliveries here" with a big arrow pointing down the driveway. Haven't had one since

Should not need a sign to have your packages delivered to the house. No excuse for leaving boxes by the road.

 

[snapping turtle]

now being the older half of the board some may not have understood the reference to digital underground’s Burger King ad placed in a song written and produce by bootsie collins goerge Clinton and featuring a very young Tupa.

when rap was not so serious and gangster

 

[jamil]

Pro Tip: If you are on the Virtual Chat Bot from UPS and you type: "you suck," the bot transfers you to a live person. :-)

Person contacted driver who laid hands on the package in truck. Assured me that it will be delivered today. Gave reason for three days "out for delivery" but not happening because the package "was scanned to be put on truck three times but never made it onto the truck." Hmmm... -1.

So with this -1, is that an overall -2? Or just a reaffirmation of the -1?

 

[jamil]

The weasel has landed. The UPS website said something like 'calculating new delivery time" all day.

"To err is human. To cover it up is weasel." Scott Adams.

-1 UPS, for having it your way for three days.

So -3 if we’re keeping track? Or reaffirming the reaffirmation?

 

[ditcherman]

UPS, you feckless weasel. My relatively pricey item was loaded onto your truck as "out for delivery" last Friday. The ETA for delivery was between 5-7pm. You never showed. Was it something I said?

I gave you another chance and, like a midlife crisis suffering absentee father, you said again "out for delivery" and would be at my doorstep by 5-7pm Saturday. Once Weekend Update began to air, I understand I was again lost to your other, more lusty pursuits.

My hopes were slim for Monday but again, you stated "out for delivery" and that you would see me between 5pm & 7pm. By 730pm, my loving wife became concerned that my paranoia was in full swing as I kept returning to the front window to peer out.

By 2100, you left me a heartless "Rescheduled" email notice and I was left sad and neglected, like Monday's Child.

Today is now Tuesday.

You've emailed me to say - once again - that my package will arrive between 1700-1900. However, the UPS website knows you better than yourself and is making no claims to your false fidelity and hollow promises:

View attachment 223900

I have an idea... if your route is so overloaded that the deliveries at the end of the route can't be met consecutive days in a row, how about you run the damn route in reverse every other day, you worthless piece of crap.

Don't even get me started when you leave a website message that the delivery failed because "no code for community access gate"... there is no gate.

-1 UPS. If you went on strike, how would we be able to tell??

-1 Burger King, just because.

You've been around here a long minute, but I don't feel like I know you. But I like you.
Do you watch a lot of daytime TV? That's really good writing.

 

[N9Zero]

You can use bing to get more details from your tracking number.